Finding the words, finding the space to talk “I’m not sure why I’m here. My wife said I should speak to someone”. Jackson was silent for a while. He looked around my office, taking in the space around and between us. His eyes rested on a painting...
Writing as a therapeutic tool Since the lockdown, many people have struggled with stress, anxiety and thoughts that can become so overwhelming they cannot sleep. Many men I have seen have struggled to communicate how they feel to their partner and have been unable to gain...
We all might feel out of control sometimes. Our minds might race, our behaviour might feel erratic, our urges might feel untamed, and our emotions might overwhelm us. We all can change how we might feel and act if we want. One way is to change the...
Demonstrating you care about the person you love can take many forms. Some of us embrace how to show we care. Others aren't so sure what caring looks like, while some feel overwhelmed or smothered by too much "caring". How we show we care might not precisely...
Time's slipping away Harvey and Gail were struggling to make their dreams happen. It was not just the dreams that weren't happening; it was the gradual steps to achieve their goals, the everyday plans to make their life together happy. It was the small details of...
One of the areas of discussion that are fraught with anxiety and distress with many couples is talking about finances. I know myself, talking about financial matters is the one area I seem to find difficult to talk about my wife. I also know that...
This year seems to have gone quickly. Whether it’s because I’m getting older or that a lot has happened this year, I don’t know. But as Einstein said, time is relative. I can remember moments where I wished they would last a little longer, such as...
Two tips to change arguments Arguments can become quite repetitive and never-ending for many couples. They can also become spiteful as you might be feeling cornered, vulnerable and scared. So you retaliate. You might also not be managing your own feelings, so you start to lash out....
Music plays its part Have you seen the John Lewis Christmas advert (2016) with Buster the Boxer? It’s very poignant. It’s poignant in a couple of ways for me. One is the joy to see the delight, secrecy, excitement and spirit of young children bouncing with...
Noticing the moment Have you ever stopped, noticed and wondered about the small details of your relationship? Or even the very minute tiny details about your partner? I mean, the minor detail that could go unnoticed if you didn't look and pay attention to what was going...
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